1978, 1987 and 1991 Exposé: The “Salad”

I’ve mentioned numerous times how much I love community cookbooks.  But they often hold a dirty little secret in the salad section.  The “salad.”  You know the one I mean:  the Waldorf, the Watergate and the Fluff.  “Salads” where the only green to be found is made of yellow #5 and blue #1.  Come on ladies. You know they belong in the dessert section, but there they are in the salad section.

Okay, I love “salads.”  Acres of fluffy, sweet deliciousness!  My mother’s signature salad was of the fluff variety:  Cool Whip, cottage cheese, lime jello and pineapple tidbits.

To start my in depth coverage of the “salad,” I turned to three mid-western community cookbooks:

The 1987 A Samplin’ of St. Mary’s by the ladies at the St. Mary’s Catholic Youth Organization of Wichita, KS

the 1978 Favorite Recipes by the Scottish Rite Ladies of Kansas City, Missouri

and the 1991 St. Mark’s Church Family Cookbook by the Christian Couples Class of Lincoln, Nebraska

Shockingly, I’ve never had Watergate Salad, so I decided to remedy that situation with this submission by Doris Heillman:

Wow, these salads are going to be a photographer’s dream!  It was incredibly delicious despite the lack of visual appeal.

Watergate Salad

9 oz. carton Cool Whip

3 3/4 oz. pkg. pistachio instant pudding mix

1 lb can crushed pineapple w/ juice

1 c. miniature marshmallows

1/2 c. chopped or crushed nuts, any kind (I used almonds)

Fold dry pudding mix into whipped topping.  Add pineapple, juice, marshmallows and nuts.  Refrigerate.  Can be done the day ahead.  Serves 8 to 10.  (Favorite Recipes)

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Next up, a salad with tantalizing name of Pink Champagne Salad.

Unfortunately, there was no champagne involved, but plenty of yum.  I did reduce the sugar to 1/2 c., but it could probably be lowered or eliminated since there was plenty of sweet.

Pink Champagne Salad

1 (8 oz.) pkg. soft cream cheese

3/4 c. white sugar

1 can chunk pineapple, drained well

1 (10 oz.) pkg. frozen strawberries, thawed (use juice)

2 bananas, sliced

1 (8 oz.) tub Cool Whip

1/2 c. chopped pecan nuts (optional)

Combine and mix well the cream cheese and sugar, then add  pineapple, strawberries, and bananas, stir, then stir in Cool Whip and nuts.  Chill until ready to serve.  Judy Spiehs

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Shoot!  I forgot to take a picture of the next one, but see previous pictures–exactly the same look but with an orangish ting.  Here are the ingredients though:

This one was good, but not amazing.  I wouldn’t really make this again.  But the real question on this one is what was Roberta doing submitting Debbie’s recipe.  Hmmm….

Debbie’s Peach Bavarian Jello Salad

1 (3 oz.) pkg. lemon jello

1 (29 oz.) can sliced peaches

2 c. Cool Whip

1/4 tsp. almond flavoring

1/4 c. sugar

dash of salt

1 c. boiling water

Drain peaches, reserving 1/3 cup syrup.  Chop peaches; dissolve jello, sugar and salt in boiling water and add reserved syrup.  Chill till slightly thickened.  Blend almond flavoring into Cool Whip.  Gradually blend Cool Whip into jello, then fold in peaches.  Pour into 5 cup mold.  Chill 4 hours.  Roberta Vernon (A Samplin’ of St. Mary’s)

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Now a trip to the land of the ill advised.  I saw this recipe for Pimento Cheese Salad and thought eww, but then wondered if it was the type of thing that was so weird, it was good?  Answer:  No.  Doris, I’m very disappointed in you.  I’m now imagining you as a elderly lady with taste buds killed by 50 years of chain smoking.  There isn’t any other good explanation for this.

Pimento Cheese Salad

2 env. Dream Whip

1 c. milk

1/2 tsp. vanilla

1 (5 oz.) jar pimento cheese

1 c. pineapple tidbits

1 1/2 c. miniature marshmallows

Whip together first 3 ingredients until like whipped cream.  Add pimento cheese and whip together.  Fold in pineapple tidbits (drained) and miniature marshmallows.  Let set several hours or overnight.  Doris Davidson (A Samplin’ of St. Mary’s)

1981 Good Idea – Sloppy Joses

Have you ever looked at a sloppy Joe and thought, “This could be sloppier.”  If so, the good folks at the Kraft kitchen have got you covered with “Sloppy Joses.”  All of the slop, less bun containment.

I found this clipping stuffed in a cookbook and knew that I had to make this one.  It’s just too bizarre to ignore.  I googled the 40 recipe booklet mentioned at the bottom of this ad and this recipe is probably from 1981.

The most difficult part of this recipe was purchasing the Kraft barbeque sauce.  As a Kansas City native, there is no shortage of fantastic, locally-made barbeque sauce.  Here’s the barbeque sauce selection at my local grocery store:

Yep, all of the items to the left of the A-1 are barbeque sauce and I couldn’t even get the whole aisle in the picture.  So you can see why I would be embarrassed to put a bottle of Kraft in my shopping cart.  (Sorry Kraft).

In other weirdness, I also made the New Year’s resolution to go back to being a vegetarian.  Compatible with a vintage food blog?  Well, kinda?  I considered a series on ’70s granola recipes, but decided there were plenty of vegetarian meat substitutes and using a packaged product would only enhance the industrial foodness of the classics.

So, here are the ingredients for the cooked portion of the recipe:

I added some vegetable oil to the skillet to make up for the natural fat in the ground beef and defrosted the “meaty” crumbles.

Then it was time to add the sauce and veggies.  I tasted the sauce.  Barbeque-ish, but a little sweet.

The recipe was a bit vague as to temperature so I put it on medium and then covered and cooked for 15 minutes as directed.

Here are the assembly ingredients:

I did get the small Velveeta because I was afraid I would veer off and buy some Rotel and “accidentally” make some Rotel dip.  Also Velveeta is surprisingly expensive.

And now for the results:

They turned out fair to middling.  The sauce was too sweet for my taste, but the Velveeta upped the taste to sufficient edibility.  I finished my serving, but I wouldn’t make it again.  If you decide to make this, I would recommend a higher quality sauce (Gates and Rufus Teague are my two favorite local brands–alas, Rufus Teague is not vegetarian).

Edit:  The vegetarian New Year’s Resolution (like most of my other resolutions) went out the window so meat’s back on the menu.

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#26 Sloppy Joses

1 lb. ground beef (I substituted Beyond Meat Beef-Free Crumbles)

1 cup KRAFT Barbecue Sauce

1/4 cup chopped green pepper

1/4 cup chopped onion

1 8 3/4 oz. can whole kernel corn, drained

8 taco shells

Shredded lettuce

Chopped tomato

VELVEETA Process Cheese Spread, sliced

Brown meat; drain. Stir in barbecue sauce, green pepper, onion and corn; cover and cook 15 minutes.  Cut process cheese spread slices into triangles.  Fill heated taco shells with lettuce, meat mixture, tomato and process cheese spread.  8 tacos.